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Dot 49: Your weakness can become your strength one day !

Posted by Praveen on October 16, 2013 at 1:45 PM Comments comments (0)



A 10-year-old boy decided to study judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a devastating car accident. The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why, after three months of training the master had taught him only one move. "Sensei," the boy finally said, "Shouldn't I be learning more moves?" "This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei replied. Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training.


Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament. Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals. This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced.


For a while, the boy appeared to be overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened. "No," the sensei insisted, "Let him continue." Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament.


He was the champion. On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind. "Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?" "You won for two reasons," the sensei answered. "First, you've almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo. And second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm." The boy's biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.


"Sometimes we feel that we have certain weaknesses and we blame god, the circumstances and our self for it but we never know that our weakness can become our strength one day. Each of us is special and important, so never think you have any weakness, never think of pride or pain, just live your life to its fullest and extract the best out of it!"

Dot 46: One has to have the fear of failure so much that you get the courage to succeed: Shahrukh khan

Posted by Praveen on October 15, 2013 at 9:20 PM Comments comments (0)


It might not be polite to call one of India's biggest stars a 'fool' , but like the Shakespearean fool, Shah Rukh sandwiched wisdom into an evening of pure 'dumb' Bollywood stardom - at a management convention in Delhi, between his 'I'm the funniest fun you'll ever have', he delivered a moving and honest piece on success and failure. Here's what he said:

I am going to say good evening again, because that's how I started the speech. First of all, it's really scary here. Some of the biggest managers of the biggest corporations in the biggest convention for management - AIMA.


It's very sad that in such an august company of people, big business houses and managers, all you could manage was to get a speaker from Bollywood to speak at the convention. The economy must be really bad.

 

Well, who am I to speak about the economic downtrend across the globe etc, or anything, for that matter? Just reading the topics being discussed before I came on stage, I was frightened. And if I'm allowed to say so, shit scared. I couldn't understand a word. Let me tell you one of the discussions they had earlier on in the day - 'Could financialisation of commodities be used to incentivise supply growth without inflating prices?'

 

Okay, if you say so. Or no, if you guys are in a bad mood, whatever you say. The other one - 'Managing liquidity supply crunch risk of NPA CSR mandate CEOs COOs CFOs UFOs'... mind-boggling and numbing for a person like me who can just about say, k-k-k-k-corporation management. And the topic that my friend Shiv (D Shivakumar, president, AIMA) told me is, I have to speak about courage, in this scared state and ill-informed mindset. But here I am, and so are all of you wonderful people. I wish you a great convention and a happy economy, and I want to thank my friend Shiv for giving me this opportunity to speak in front of such an extraordinary amazement of grey matter - all of you highly successful, perhaps the most successful people in the world - and he chose me to give you a speech on success. Am I the only one seeing the irony here? Or are you all too busy holding back your laughter on what I'm going to say?

 

Apart from my lack of knowledge and fear, the only other thing is that I'm not good at giving discourses on how to succeed. I don't know what I'm going to say to you highly motivated people that you don't already know about life. So I'll bore you with a few details of my life. But let me warn you, this is a recycled speech. It's generic and it's simple.

 

Successful people are almost never able to pinpoint what it was that made them so. Take Warren Buffet. Here's a guy who must get asked five times a day how he became the most successful investor of his era. His answers? 'Reinvest your profits, limit what you borrow' - are no different from what any fool could tell you. But he's not being cagey - he simply doesn't know. Success is a wonderful thing, but it tends not to be the sort of experience that we learn from. We enjoy it, perhaps we even deserve it, but we don't acquire anything from it. And maybe that's why, it cannot be passed on either. Being successful does not mean my children will also be so, however much I teach them what all did in my life, and they follow it to the letter.

 

Success just happens, really. So, talking about how to become successful is a waste of time. So let me tell you, very honestly, whatever happened to me, happened because I'm really scared of failure. I don't want as much to succeed, as much I don't want to fail. I come from a very normal middle/lower middle-class family, and I saw a lot of failure. My father was a beautiful man, and the most successful failure in the world. My mom also failed to stay with me long enough to see me become a movie star. We were quite poor, actually - at certain junctures of our lives, I had even experienced what we call in Delhi a kudki - how many of you know about it? This is a thing that the government does when you don't pay the rent of your house, and they throw you and your stuff on the roads.

 

Let me tell you, poverty is not an ennobling experience at all. Poverty entails fear and stress and sometimes, depression. I've seen my parents go through it many times - it means a thousand petty humiliations and hardships. At an early age after my parents died, I equated poverty with failure. I just didn't want to be poor. So when I got a chance to act in films, it wasn't out of any creative desire that I signed my films - it was just purely out of the fear of failure and poverty. Most of them were discards of other actors and the producers could not find anyone else to do them. Deewana, which was my first hit, was actually discarded by an actor called Arman Kohli. Baazigar was rejected by Mr Salman Khan, and Darr was negated by Mr Aamir Khan. I did them all just to make sure I was working. The timing or something was right, and that made it happen that I became a big star.

 

I asked Dilip Kumar sa'ab one day - we were watching Devdas together - and I said, 'Sir, yeh joh picture aapne ki hai, itni achhi acting...' I had made my own version of Devdas, and I was sitting next to him, and I said, 'Sir, yeh picture jo aapne ki hai, bahut achhi hai. Kyun ki aapne? Aapko yeh character kyun achha laga?' And he looked at me and he said, 'Pata nahin yaar, bas thoda sa... kya thaa woh... Bimalda ek lakh rupaye de rahe the mujhko...' That was the only reason he did Devdas at that point of time. Of course he's the greatest actor the world will ever see, but at that point of time, that's all he wanted. That sometimes, our success is not the direct result of our actions. It just happens on its own, and we take the credit for it, out of embarrassment sometimes.

 

So I believe the true road to success is not the desire for success, but the fear of failure. I tell everyone, if you don't enjoy and be afraid of your failure hard enough, you will never succeed. I'm not going to stand here and tell you that failure is fun, but I will insist and hope that all of us will experience it in some measure. The extent of what each one of us perceives as failure must differ, as it should, but I believe that everyone should pass through some stages of failure before they succeed. So how does one fail?

  

I'm sorry, this is what I teach my kids, so if it sounds a little novice and silly, please excuse me. First and foremost, it's not the absence of failure that makes you a success, it is your response to failure that actually helps to buffer the reverses you experience. I myself have two responses to failure. First is pragmatism. I believe that if one approach does not work, another one might, as in business, too. The second response is fatalism. I fool myself that it was bound to happen, and that I need to move on, and not get caught up in the oft-repeated question - 'God, why does it happen to me?' It happened, move on.


Failure also gives me an incentive to greater exertion, harder work, which invariably leads to greater success in most cases. Failure is an amazing teacher. If you don't fail, you will never learn. And if you don't learn, you will never grow. There is a well-known story of a bank president who was asked the secret of his success, and he said, "Right decisions". How do you get to know how to make the right decisions, came the follow-up question. "Experience," was the answer. Well, how do you get experience, asked his interrogator. "Wrong decisions," he replied.

 

Sometimes, it has also taught me to stop pretending that I'm someone other than what I'm supposed to be. It gives me a clear-cut direction that 'Hey, maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this. Let me just concentrate on doing and finishing things that really matter to me that really define me, instead of following a particular course that's actually taking me away from what my core liking is'. KKR, my cricket team - and Shiv knows this - is one such example. Till friends like him gave me advice, I was doing everything. Then I got myself a COO, set up a whole new department, and the job I think has been handled much better than what I think I was (doing). And I'm willing to accept that.

 

Failure also gets you to find out who your real friends are. The true strength of your relationships only gets tested in the face of strong adversity. I lost a lot of friends post-Ra.One, apart from losing a lot of audience too. And post-Chennai Express, even though I've made no new friends, I have a whole new set of enemies, which is also interesting to know.

 

Regular failures have also taught me empathy towards others. Being a star, it is easy for me to be prone to the notion that I'm superior, self-sufficient and fantastic, instead of realising that I was just plain lucky or got some lucky breaks. Overcoming some of my failures has made me discover that I have a strong will, and (am) more disciplined than I suspected. It has helped me have confidence in my ability to survive. So, all in all, I think failure is a good thing.

 

I won't bore you with more details of how failure is a good thing because you won't call me back for a talk on success. But I'd like to tell you all that life is not just a checklist of acquisitions, attainments and fulfilments. Your qualifications and CVs don't matter, your jobs don't matter. Instead, life is difficult and complicated and beyond your control, and to know that with humility, respecting your failures will help you survive its vicissitudes.

 

There is the greatest practical benefit in making a few failures in life. I say making because I believe failure is not an exterior force. I believe it happens due to our own actions, our own reactions, in such convoluted ways sometimes that we may not understand, but we are the reason for it. So don't be weighed down by it - relish it, cherish it, the experience, and learn from it. By accepting it all and experiencing it will you experience success, not in isolation of life's full offerings.

 

Let me conclude by saying that my hope for you is a lifelong love of learning, exciting and inspiring projects, dreams, businesses, profits, power lunches or whatever turns you guys and girls on. But alongside, I wish you a fair number of moderate failures. By experiencing all, I hope that you will experience success. Success is never final, just like failure is never fatal. Courage is ill-defined if you think it means doing something macho, risky or chancy. If that happens at somebody else's cost, it's even less courageous. Courage is doing whatever you are afraid to do - personally scared to do - in whichever capacity you work. There can be no courage unless you are scared. So be scared to feel courage, be fearful.

 

I believe one has to have the fear of failure so much that you get the courage to succeed. And that, my friends, is my learned piece of courage in success or what I call the success of failure, and being scared enough to be courageous, to make it so. Or if I were to put it into words that surround me, when I entered here and I was scared of all this corporate jargon that I heard, 'This is my theory of the management of high-rising failure to convert it into success by growth index of 100%, while understanding the indices of fear and not compromising the syntax of our courage globally while keeping a holistic 360 degree view of our domestic market through rigorous system and processes.'

 

In simple terms or film language, which is what I do - 'If at first you don't succeed, reload and try again. Shoot fast, shoot first and be ready to take a bullet too. And remember what Don said - "Iss company ke management ke dushman ki sabse badi galti yeh hai, ki woh is company ka dushman hai. Kyunki jab tak dushman apni pehli chaal chalta hai, yeh company apni agli chaal chaal chuki hoti hai."

Dot 34: Think before you act.

Posted by Praveen on October 9, 2013 at 8:15 AM Comments comments (0)


One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops-a few People got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, Built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the Driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.

 

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened-Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth. This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him.

 

Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John

doesn't pay!" the driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, "And why not?"

 

With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a Bus pass."

 

"Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one."

 

Dot 29 - We are what we believe we are !

Posted by Praveen on May 28, 2013 at 9:50 PM Comments comments (0)



A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $ 500 Note. In the room of 200, he asked, "who would like this $ 500?' Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this note to one of you, but first let me do this.'


He proceeded to crumple the note up. He then asked, 'who still wants it?' Still, the hands were up in the air. 'Well,' he replied. 'What if I do this’? And the dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up now, all crumpled and dirty.


'Now who still wants it?' Still the hands went into the air. "My friends, you all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $ 500" Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless.


But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never Loose your value.

"Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams". "We are what we believe we are".